Nine months ago, I had a major surgery–an organ was removed. As of today, I am mostly recovered. There are still some activities that cause me to swell at my surgery site–mainly digging holes in the ground. I’m okay with that. I figured it would take an entire year to be 100%. I am trying to be patient with the process.
The problem I’m having is that those around me are growing impatient. I’ll give you one example:
I am an assistant manager of a retail store. My job is very physical. It has taken me quite a while to feel I can give 100% physically to the job. Last week I got there. I felt bold, in control, and confident.
Then I hurt my back.
It’s not a major deal. I need rest, ice, and muscle relaxers. I am healing. But my boss is doubting that I have the physical prowess the ever return to my former glory.
{Aside–Former Glory: About a year before my surgery, my boss had a “come to Jesus” talk with me. Apparently I wasn’t pulling my weight at work. It was “shape up or ship out” and I got the message (you can read about that talk below*). In that year, I turned it completely around and got a great review.}
Now he has doubts about me again. I’m sure my back went out because I am not conditioned to work at the increased pace. I will get stronger. But after gaining his confidence last year, to lose it again through no fault of my own is extremely frustrating.
I will figure my way through this. I always do. It just makes life #$%^ing hard(er). After the last year, it is the last thing I need.
~Drew
* https://ukeepwalkingforward.wordpress.com/2017/09/29/crazy-brain/
U Keep Walking Forward 