Liar Poet

From 1996. Sitting, trying to wrap words abound the chaos in my head in the midst of a depression cycle, can be an agonizing exercise. Here,  I capture the struggle between the urge to write down the emotions and the inability to do so.

As if I never felt this emotion,

This feeling of emptiness, of mindlessness,

I again try to explain, pen on paper,

Why this madness has crept so silently

Upon me again.

I have no strength to fend.

 

The hurt blends so easily in with my life

And others believe my explanation, my push away.

I fool them again, this them we all speak of, these

People of conscious desire,

of mindless fodder.

 

Third stanza blues as the thought trails

And the concern for expression fades.

Fallacy, lie, and deception are bread into words.

My ramblings are lie, deceit, carnage.

Selfish, selfless, we are.

“If you give a shit, you’ll go far, boy.”

~Keep Walking

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About ~Drew

I am a survivor of childhood torture. Each day, I put one foot in front of the other, moving forward. To do any less would spell my own destruction. My music/poetry/prose deal with the devastating effect of this kind of abuse on a human being: me. My experiences/thoughts/ideas/misconceptions are exposed here for all to see. Here. I am lain bare, naked, hidden only be the cloak of anonymity.
This entry was posted in C-PTSD, coping, depression, introspection, poetry, psychology, recovery and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Liar Poet

  1. Olivia says:

    If this is about the “inability”, then it’s 100% how we all feel. Numb.. almost dead yet wanting to live.. no direction.. yet wanting to move..
    Very well done!!

  2. Olivia says:

    Hello,
    How are you?
    I invite you to join our poetry community at http://jinglepoetry.blogspot.com/,
    It would be great for you to take a look at our playground, sign in to follow if you wish,
    our major event is Monday Poetry Potluck, you are encouraged to link in one of your favorite poem, or write a poem over the weekend that is related to our theme, (week 6 is seven sins), hope to see you stop by, do let us know when you do and leave us a note so that one of our officials gets back to you….

    Our Monday poetry potluck is open from Sunday 8pm to Wednesday, 8am. you have 60 hours to submit one quality poem and share.
    Writing your entry ahead of the time and link in as early as possible would get you more traffic and is strongly recommend…please let me know via email if you have further questions…
    Happy Weekend.
    U Rock!
    xoxox

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